Last updated: March 17, 2026
I’m sure every parent has been there. You ask your toddler to do something, like put on their shoes. They ignore you. You ask again, and again you are ignored. It’s like you are not even there.
Finally, after maybe the fifth time of asking and your toddler not listening, you break down and yell at your child. Five minutes later and the guilt sets in. Why did you yell? How can you get your toddler to listen? Why is parenting so hard and frustrating? No one told me it would be THIS hard.
This situation was happening way too often in my household with two 4 year-olds and a 2 year-old. I decided to do some research to address the problem. After trying some things out, I found two unbelievably easy things that got my toddlers listening to me.
After implementing these two SIMPLE things, my kids are listening and I have found that I am not yelling at my kids. Since it’s so effective, I had to share it here.
How To Get Your Toddler To Listen
Have you ever noticed yelling at toddlers is just completely ineffective? One would think it would light a fire under them to do what you say so they don’t get in trouble.
When you yell, I’m guessing your toddler either freezes because they are afraid, or they ignore you. Once in a while it’s effective, but most of the time it’s not.
Yelling does not make a child accomplish a task faster or more efficiently. In fact, sometimes it has the opposite effect. Plus, it’s scary for your kids and can make them feel unsafe.
What can you do instead to make things calmer in your household? Here are the two easy steps I have used and recommend you do too to get your toddler to listen.
- Kneel down to your toddler’s level and make eye contact when you speak to him or her.
- Have your child acknowledge they heard you.
Why are these two things so effective in getting toddlers to listen? I believe it’s because you are making sure they cannot ignore you.
1 – Make Eye Contact
This is part one of ensuring that your toddler hears you. Once eye contact has been established, tell your child what you want them to do.
In my experience with my kids, if they don’t want to do something, their immediate response is to ignore you by acting like they don’t hear you. By making eye contact and getting acknowledgement, it’s pretty much impossible to be ignored by your children.
2 – Get Acknowledgement
The second thing you must do after making eye contact and telling your child what you want them to do, is have them acknowledge they heard you. An example could be:
Parent: “I need you to go potty before we get in the car.”
Child: “Ok.”
Parent: (If i’ts been a minute and you notice your child is not going potty) “What did I say you need to do before we go in the car?”
Now your child has are two options. Either they know what they are supposed to be doing. Or, your child has forgotten your original request to go potty.
If your child does know what they are supposed to be doing, get down to your child’s eye level again and tell them they need to go potty. If they don’t go, you could have a consequence – like no T.V.
On the other hand, if your child doesn’t know that they are supposed to go potty. Get down to eye level again and tell them they need to go potty.
Have your child repeat back what they need to be doing by asking: “What do you need to go do before we go in the car?”
Make sure your child gives you the right answer, and if not, correct them.
What If Your Toddler Still Doesn’t Listen?
Now, let’s be honest. Is this method going to be 100% effective. Of course not. But, it will improve your toddler’s listening and it will lead you to stop feeling like you are always asking your kids to do things and getting no response.
Of course there is always the scenario that your child just doesn’t want to do the thing you have asked them to do. And they just feel like being stubborn.
If this is the case, the next thing you can try is explaining why you need your child to do the task at hand. An example is:
Parent: “You can’t have dessert, unless you eat your dinner.”
Now you have offered and an incentive (a treat) if your picky toddler eats dinner. If you cannot think of a positive spin on the task at hand, you could offer some sort of reward, like extra T.V. But this is a last resort.
Stop the yelling and try these simple tricks to get your toddler to listen better.
You will probably find that you are not resorting to yelling at your little ones anymore. It really is not helpful or effective to yell at children anyway. And, the main reason parents end up yelling is because their children aren’t listening, which is extremely frustrating.
I know by speaking to my kids at their eye level and making sure they acknowledge and understand what I’m asking them to do, their listening has improved immensely. I hope this easy two-step process for getting your toddler to listen make things a little bit easier on this difficult road called parenting.
